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Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.098 13 Apr 2018
The idea of Webquotes was first introduced in Version 2.01 in Jul 2005
Too late to be a boomer, too young to be a millenial
Over pavement, through the hedge, half way up a leap. I thought, this was fun I’ll go again but this time in a Jeep
I would be happy for a pig to grow a heart for me, then ... I could enjoy a good bacon sandwich afterwards
A head so strong. Tough mandible. I am designed to make a kill
They even included a baboon with a bright red bum
The car was very special, as you might expect for a quarter of a million pounds
A balcony on the ground floor with a drop all of three inches
No malice in the thinking nor sharpness in the knife
I don't set fire to Oxfam shops or kick Labradors
I was the most upset by this. Very upset. Extraordinarily upset. Boundary tantrum upset
The Honda was still as ugly as a Yak. Only the Yak now had bigger horns
Where can you find me? Only at the centre of the universe. That's where
Doesn't include tips on reconfiguring Lara Croft in topless mode
But no-one 'cept me, could ever forsee, the day we ran out of concrete
If I want to alter my mind I switch to BBC4
The bike wedged itself behind the car's front wheel, I raised my torso and took up flying
"Letter!" He bellows
'Only open for a year'. It will still be up and running in some form in 20 years - Mark my words
I'd agree that bad driving deserves all the bottom expansion in the world
Well worth mulling over a pint or two with the newly redundant Brigadier
This is appallingly lazy and frankly a hindrance to all
You say the postage to the USA is £6.00 so how much is it to Texas?
Unless the paint could be made black. And reflective
I make no secret of the fact that I'm a turbo charged V8 with nitrous injection
We don't want to end up in an andronomous society where you can't tell your mother from the plumber
Central heating in the sixties and seventies was restricted, by law I believe, to my Grandparent's house
No-one came to the rescue, presumably assuming I was OK or dead, with neither option needing their involvement
Audio is supplied by two small shrill insects inside somewhere that like to go bleep very loudly at times
Anything associated with Kristin Scott Thomas must be OK
After driving across Europe, I knew I was back in Britain. The washer bottle froze
For that I propose a simpler system. That I shall be legally allowed to carry a firearm and shoot him
Yes, you too could look like a reclusive film star. In your twenty-six year old Datsun Cherry
Some may even ask why Christian music isn't featured. At least that group should forgive me
Within days the area around the Loch is totally transformed
I can't recall if John Noakes did the jump, or if Shep did it tied to his lead
I do not fall under the category of 'it won't change my life'. The hell it will. Big time
If thanks were made in time you can have the rest of mine
Drake would just bleat on about his potatoes, Ghandi wouldn't touch the beef, Mother Theresa would nick the tea towels
If Bill Gates is reading this. Get in touch. You'll find my hourly rate very reasonable. Compared to yours
They used to put a telephone on every corner but drunks got them confused with loos
When you have anything you ever sought. You seek nothing at all. Switch me off
He checks again, in desperation swinging his hands wildly from side to side
I know that you prefer spaghetti to coleslaw, cats to dogs, Chopin to Strauss and Springsteen to both
Policies so far right they needed a wide load sign
My political system will be launched in 'plasticine brown'
How on earth do you kill speed?
The waiters even knew not to offer it on the Cornflakes. Real class
Greens release two dozen steeds and the rubber feet do bleed
By and large they are the most evil, deceitful, mean, bullying individuals you are ever likely to meet
I'm aching in the places that you haven't got. An' you are feeling deadly hot
I remember this suit once. Name of Rogers. Used to speak with a limp I recall
As for Apple Macintosh? What's the point? I thought their skins were waterproof
That way I could discreetly give it a blow job and rest in peace
A revolution in tea making. A quantum step no less
When I get up in the morning, I really can't stop yawning. Until I've had my first of the day
Don't say a thing. Just do it. Just make this dream come true
30 years ago this was enough to make me tear out the advert and hang it on my wall
I soon understood that it's not just a case of clicking on a blank bit of the internet and typing away
Getting up at the crack of birds
You might even suggest 'fun' items like sharing a bath
War is a word that we don't need
Turning over half a million pounds and making a small profit
People working from home shouldn't necessarily actually be doing it from their own house
I leaned a bit more and something eventually grounded out. My handlebar ends
A Brazilian dream, the coffee bean. The making of Empires and Land. For all that you see, I would rather have tea. Darjeeling, Ceylon or Assam
