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Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.098 13 Apr 2018
The idea of Webquotes was first introduced in Version 2.01 in Jul 2005




Too late to be a boomer, too young to be a millenial

Over pavement, through the hedge, half way up a leap. I thought, this was fun I’ll go again but this time in a Jeep

I would be happy for a pig to grow a heart for me, then ... I could enjoy a good bacon sandwich afterwards

A head so strong. Tough mandible. I am designed to make a kill

They even included a baboon with a bright red bum

The car was very special, as you might expect for a quarter of a million pounds

A balcony on the ground floor with a drop all of three inches

No malice in the thinking nor sharpness in the knife

I don't set fire to Oxfam shops or kick Labradors

I was the most upset by this. Very upset. Extraordinarily upset. Boundary tantrum upset

The Honda was still as ugly as a Yak. Only the Yak now had bigger horns

Where can you find me? Only at the centre of the universe. That's where

Doesn't include tips on reconfiguring Lara Croft in topless mode

But no-one 'cept me, could ever forsee, the day we ran out of concrete

If I want to alter my mind I switch to BBC4

The bike wedged itself behind the car's front wheel, I raised my torso and took up flying

"Letter!" He bellows

'Only open for a year'. It will still be up and running in some form in 20 years - Mark my words

I'd agree that bad driving deserves all the bottom expansion in the world

Well worth mulling over a pint or two with the newly redundant Brigadier

This is appallingly lazy and frankly a hindrance to all

You say the postage to the USA is £6.00 so how much is it to Texas?

Unless the paint could be made black. And reflective

I make no secret of the fact that I'm a turbo charged V8 with nitrous injection

We don't want to end up in an andronomous society where you can't tell your mother from the plumber

Central heating in the sixties and seventies was restricted, by law I believe, to my Grandparent's house

No-one came to the rescue, presumably assuming I was OK or dead, with neither option needing their involvement

Audio is supplied by two small shrill insects inside somewhere that like to go bleep very loudly at times

Anything associated with Kristin Scott Thomas must be OK

After driving across Europe, I knew I was back in Britain. The washer bottle froze

For that I propose a simpler system. That I shall be legally allowed to carry a firearm and shoot him

Yes, you too could look like a reclusive film star. In your twenty-six year old Datsun Cherry

Some may even ask why Christian music isn't featured. At least that group should forgive me

Within days the area around the Loch is totally transformed

I can't recall if John Noakes did the jump, or if Shep did it tied to his lead

I do not fall under the category of 'it won't change my life'. The hell it will. Big time

If thanks were made in time you can have the rest of mine

Drake would just bleat on about his potatoes, Ghandi wouldn't touch the beef, Mother Theresa would nick the tea towels

If Bill Gates is reading this. Get in touch. You'll find my hourly rate very reasonable. Compared to yours

They used to put a telephone on every corner but drunks got them confused with loos

When you have anything you ever sought. You seek nothing at all. Switch me off

He checks again, in desperation swinging his hands wildly from side to side

I know that you prefer spaghetti to coleslaw, cats to dogs, Chopin to Strauss and Springsteen to both

Policies so far right they needed a wide load sign

My political system will be launched in 'plasticine brown'

How on earth do you kill speed?

The waiters even knew not to offer it on the Cornflakes. Real class

Greens release two dozen steeds and the rubber feet do bleed

By and large they are the most evil, deceitful, mean, bullying individuals you are ever likely to meet

I'm aching in the places that you haven't got. An' you are feeling deadly hot

I remember this suit once. Name of Rogers. Used to speak with a limp I recall

As for Apple Macintosh? What's the point? I thought their skins were waterproof

That way I could discreetly give it a blow job and rest in peace

A revolution in tea making. A quantum step no less

When I get up in the morning, I really can't stop yawning. Until I've had my first of the day

Don't say a thing. Just do it. Just make this dream come true

30 years ago this was enough to make me tear out the advert and hang it on my wall

I soon understood that it's not just a case of clicking on a blank bit of the internet and typing away

Getting up at the crack of birds

You might even suggest 'fun' items like sharing a bath

War is a word that we don't need

Turning over half a million pounds and making a small profit

People working from home shouldn't necessarily actually be doing it from their own house

I leaned a bit more and something eventually grounded out. My handlebar ends

A Brazilian dream, the coffee bean. The making of Empires and Land. For all that you see, I would rather have tea. Darjeeling, Ceylon or Assam