The @vinceunlimited Twitter Story

Twitter, the online micro blogging service, was launched in July 2006 and I joined at the beginning of 2009. At the time of posting I am still active on the service and you can still find my feed by searching @vinceunlimited on the Twitter.com site. This page will eventually house the best of all my Twitter content, curated from my whole historic feed.

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Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.325 29 Oct 2021
Added Version 5.315 24 Jun 2020



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Best Tweets of 2009 - Best Tweets of 2010 - Best Tweets of 2011 - Best Tweets of 2012 - Best Tweets of 2013 - Best Tweets of 2014 - Best Tweets of 2015 - Best Tweets of 2017 - Best Tweets of 2018 - Primary Tweets: My Twitter Story of 2009 - Ten Tweets: My Twitter Story of 2010 - 3rd Year Tweets: My Twitter Story of 2011 - Tweety Twelve: My Twitter Story of 2012 - Thirteen Tweets: My Twitter Story of 2013 - Twitter '14: My Twitter Story of 2014 - 2015 Tweets: My Twitter Story of 2015 - Twitter Break: My Twitter Story of 2016 - Half Hearted: My Twitter Story of 2017 - The Beginning of Antisocial Media: My Twitter Story of 2018 - Twitter Block - Twitter Novel



Best Tweets of 2018

For those of you that just like the best of the best I have curated this list of my top ten best Tweets from 2018. Based on my own choice, not based on view numbers, likes, comments or retweets. All in no significant order other than date of posting.

Got a rescue dog. He keeps bringing me apples. I think he used to be a teacher’s pet
Stephen Hawking’s Cookery Book, A Brief History Of Thyme, wasn’t his best seller
The U.K. has carried out air strikes. What has the air done to deserve this?
A mate of mine told me he had an f in maths. Which explains why he failed his English
I'm suffering from adjective amnesia. I just can't describe how it feels
There’s a 12.7% chance you won’t believe this statistic
Started reading the instructions on my old Superglue bottle. Now I just can’t put it down
It’s #flyingantday
And I forgot to get a card
Searched #Clintons
Nothing
The U.K. Government and the opposition keep arguing about the way to end austerity. Allow me to assist. It’s quite simple. The way to end austerity is with a y
Things in shops without descriptions are priceless

Have I picked the ten best from 2018? If you want to know the full story of my Tweets in 2018 just scroll down.

Author: Vince Poynter
Curated: Version 5.325 29 Oct 2021
First Published: On Twitter during 2018



The Beginning of Antisocial Media: My Twitter Story of 2018

The further time moves on the more accurately one can judge history so summarising a period of past tweeting can only be done clearly several years later. The potential downside to this is that it is tempting to read content with greater hindsight than was available at the time. It's 2021 but this article is about my Twitter content in 2018 and I am already seeing that amongst the general silliness and contemporary social commentary 2018 may have been the year that Social Media itself, or at least my experience of it mainly through Twitter, started altering for the worse. However I admit that I did not necessarily see this as clearly at the time despite predicting and naming the downfall in a post made in mid August.

The end of the previous year saw the word Fake News listed as word of the year by the American Dialect Society and Collins English Dictionary. Ironic that it is a fake word given that it is actually two words. In 2018 Oxford Languages would eventually award the term Toxic as their word of the year with Gammon as a contender. Clearly SM posts were helping to drive this vitriol and helping to turn a previously friendly discord and banter on platforms into an aggressive verbal tirade at the shortest opportunity.

This new attitude was partly politically driven by the appointment in the United States of Donald Trump as President in 2017 and his growing divisive policies based on falsehoods, exaggeration and self interests plus the realities of Brexit in the UK along with an ineffective Prime Minister in Theresa May and even weaker opposition leader in Jeremy Corbyn, who was actively propped up by a vociferous, determined and single minded support base who were not representative of the majority of the party.

However my 2018 posts could hardly be cited as a reason for this tidal change partly because I tend to avoid unpleasant and highly charged subjects and also because they were virtually all original tweets, not usually borne from replies to others or simple re-tweets much in the vein of my style to date. In fact the vitriol that I refer to above seems to come mainly from replies, retorts and counter arguments within comments to original posts. Original commentary posts by individuals don't usually directly or deliberately incite hatred, even if they sometimes post thoughts on a possibly controversial subject for discussion which then gets misinterpreted by an ignorant, wilful or malicious respondent.

As a result of all my original content posting I have touched upon many varied stories occurring during the year including the Beast from the East and Snowmaggedon; the Russian Salisbury poisoning and general state hacking; being knowingly blocked on Twitter for the first time due to a misunderstanding over Echo Chamber etiquette; the delete FaceBook campaign; my Norwegian cruise; the marriage of Prince Harry to Meghan Markle; the summer World Cup; Californian wildfires and Brexit deal failures. Plus all the intertwined characteristic silliness, humour and daft commentary of course.

So what lies below is the best of my Tweets from 2018, listed as they were published, unedited in all their glory? All the entries posted below are [mostly] exactly as they were posted online contemporaneously, without rechecking spelling, grammatical corrections or censure, due to a desire to maintain historical accuracy. However I have added an odd explanatory [word, letter or sentence] to make sense of some situations as they appeared at the time.

1 January 18

It’s only bloody 2018! How did that happen? [Notwithstanding the obvious fact it was 2017 just previously]

It continues... If you want to read the full article just click the appropriate blue button above.

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.325 29 Oct 2021
First Published: On Twitter during 2018



Twitter Block

I had some time this weekend to idly look at Twitter. After I had read the content of those who I follow and then browsed the interesting Twitter Trending topics I started to look for a promising subject to interact with.

The Twitter Trending topics are generally mature discussions by the time they are aired and most angles are covered by then. Twitter is very much a now thing and subject matter is quickly outdated so getting involved on anything here is mostly futile.

My next point of call may be Twitter’s own selected suggestions. However these are rarely useful. With only three suggestions made and each from an algorithm that is too narrow so I usually find these pointless.

If I’m in the mood for discussion I don’t want a viewpoint that is just like my own and I certainly don’t think a conversation with someone who mostly retweets other people’s material would be satisfactory. I appreciate an original thinker, someone prepared to do a little bit of writing.

Finally, in the absence of a genuine random Twitter Feed I look to the suggestions the service makes based on my perceived likes. In my case these subjects are cars and comedians. Naturally my tastes are wider than this of course but not according to Twitter.

So I read these offerings and often chip in with comments on the subjects that most interest me.

And, if I have some time, I seek to increase my options by looking at who else is commenting on these subjects and then possibly delve deeper into their feeds as well.

It was during a search like this that I happened upon a user who had themselves commented on a celebrity Tweet. One that is irrelevant to this tale and now long forgotten.

I checked a little deeper and discovered that this person appeared to use the service in the way that I do. That is to say original written content, not merely a lazy bunch of retweets, pictures of their food/cats or tiresome religious style quotations. And I noticed that they had pinned an interesting Tweet to the top of their feed which was a survey about whether a particular, named comedian was funny.

In the way the survey question was set out I immediately anticipated that the author didn’t actually want to know the answer but really wanted to take an opportunity to gather like minded dislikes.

But I noticed the survey was flawed as it offered up three options - Funny, Not Funny or Irrelevant. You can probably already see why I jumped to the conclusion about the bias of the survey.

Anyway, in a bid to encourage this member I opened a discussion suggesting the flaw in such a survey, positing that one could conclude two answers were correct and a conversation followed. The Tweeter even posted a 'like' on my comment.

They then explained it was only an attempt to measure respondents to see what sort of people they were and I replied with the point that a respondent’s Twitter avatar was not necessarily an indication of who was making the choice.

The author then clarified a point about their original Tweet and them actually seeking an Echo Chamber Effect, which is, to quote Wikipedia, 'a metaphorical description of a situation in which beliefs are amplified or reinforced by communication and repetition inside a closed system'. They then clearly pointed out that they wanted respondents to think like they did and agree that the comedian was clearly not funny.

In actual fact, although often controversial, the comedian is highly popular so on the spectrum of comedians should generally be classed as funny given such limited choices.

So I took the survey and marked them as funny. At which point I was able to note that I was the only one who had done this. Twitter surveys do not let you know the trend or votes until a vote is cast, which prevents forced bias toward a less popular choice.

I wasn't really such an outlier. In fairness only eight others had bothered with the survey, a very low, statistically unreliable number, mostly voting for Not Funny. This contravened an earlier claim by the author that the option Irrelevant was trending.

Then I re-engaged with the author noting this skew towards the idea that the comedian was Not Funny and added a comment that this was a typical response to a comedian’s work in general. To reinforce the point, I also suggested that, as opposed to comics, poor actors don’t suffer from surveys about the quality of their work.

It appears that this hit a nerve. A reply came back stating that the survey was over a week old and as I was now responding they assumed that I had actively sought out the Tweet just to be a 'spoilsport', along with a suggestion that I desist being such a person and ending the message with a firm invite to leave the conversation.

A few points to note:

  • The survey was still active and had another day and some hours to finish

  • I found it because it was pinned to the top of the user’s feed. A place Twitter users can ensure they get maximum attention

  • Twitter doesn’t work that way. People can join and leave when they wish to. It is a public forum

  • I could even claim it was my own conversation topic that I was being strongly invited to leave
  • I felt I had been unfairly libelled about the motive for my conversation and unfairly called a name. So I decided, as is my right, to politely reply once more.

    I noted that they had misinterpreted my intention, that I didn’t seek the tweet but came across it and thought it interesting so started the conversation. I added that they now choose to terminate it, rather impolitely. And suggested that I seemingly didn’t fit their narrative. However I did finally note that I will leave them to it and finished off with a simple message - Be kind.

    I had no intention of continuing a conversation that appeared to have reached an impasse.

    However curiosity led to me checking to see if a response came and as I was reading the rude comments that were being fired back by the author to their followers, without including me, the feed suddenly disappeared.

    I had been blocked.

    Unable to see the rest of the continued libel and unable to respond.

    It was the Twitter equivalent of someone steaming out of the room whilst shouting back abuse and slamming the door.

    Let me be clear. I do not object to being blocked. If you can’t handle a conversation that is not feeding your own bias then that is fine. Everybody has a right to be who they choose to be.

    I find it sad, however, that this person does not wish to open their mind at all to a reasoned, alternative point of view.

    And downright rude to be libellous without being subject to recourse.

    After all, when all is said and done, I took some time to carefully craft an interesting conversation with a low level user of a system where my only expressed opinion was that comedian’s generally get a raw deal and I had taken some of my valuable time to take part in that person’s public survey expressing an honest opinion. A survey which had hardly received any other traction from a person who I initially thought might deserve more than their handful of followers. Generally I try to support those with less followers and initially thought I may have discovered another interesting person to follow.

    In continuation of my polite attitude towards this exchange I have not sought to belittle the Twitterer on this platform who I had the conversation with so will not advertise their details here.

    Nor will I name the comedian who was being subjected to the initial attempted trolling. In fact it is interesting that although named in the original survey no attempt was made to involve them as no hashtag or Twitter handle was included by the original author.

    However, as can be rightly conferred throughout this article I am interested in thoughts about this exchange, the merits and disadvantages of being a comedian and of learning alternative opinions. So please feel free to comment.

    And I promise you, no matter what you think I will not block you. Because that way I am really blocking myself.

    Plus, I know, it does hurt a little.

    Be kind.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Version 5.244 30 Nov 2018
    First published: WordPress Blog on 26 Mar 2018



    Best Tweets of 2017

    For those of you that just like the best of the best I have curated this list of my top ten best Tweets of 2017. Based on my personal choice, not based on views, likes, comments or retweets. They are in no significant order other than date of posting.

    My exit poll...
    Con 28.9
    Lab 6 carat
    SNP Chickens
    UKIP 4 maids a milking
    Rabbits win
    As accurate as the official exit poll
    Don't know what all the fuss is about. I had an electric car years ago. A Scalextric
    Seen on a headstone. Stand back. It's catching #NationalTellAJokeDay
    Ahh Saturday mornings. Like a Sunday morning only a bit earlier in the week
    Put a security camera in one of my garden ornaments
    (Note that all views are my Gnome)
    Why are the #Brexit talks taking so long? Is #Google Translate really slow?
    In the eighties there were only two certainties. Death and faxes
    Nothing wrong with dog farms as long as they are planted far enough apart #itv #GMB
    You know, I’m at that age where the only thing you really get at #Christmas is older
    It’s #BoxingDay and unfortunately for me I’ve been teamed up with Mike Tyson

    Have I picked the ten best? If you want to know the full story of my Tweets in 2017 just scroll down.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Curated: Version 5.315 24 Jun 2020
    First Published: Twitter during 2017



    Half Hearted: My Twitter Story of 2017

    This is the story of my 2017 Tweeting Year. Or at least the most remarkable ones.

    Note that once more this collection will be more enjoyable if you start off on the understanding that this is not a reputable news agency nor a travelogue or a load of pointless lifestyle snippets. You have to understand that this is a random take on a variety of eclectic subjects mostly in an attempt to extract a bit of humour in each carefully written, crafted paragraph.

    All the entries posted below are [mostly] exactly as they were posted online, contemporaneously, without rechecking spelling, grammatical corrections or censure, due to a desire to maintain historical accuracy. However I have added an odd explanatory [word, letter or sentance] to make sense of some situations as they appeared at the time.

    If you have been following my Twitter story you will know that my enthusiasm for posting had waned in 2016. I felt self conscious about that so used the chance of a new year change to restart my contributions, with typical humour.

    1 January 17

    Just woke up after a year asleep. Did I miss anything 2016?

    It continues... If you want to read the full article just click the appropriate blue button above.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Version 5.315 24 Jun 2020
    Tweets First Published: Twitter during 2017



    Twitter Break: My Twitter Story of 2016

    I started a Twitter account at the beginning of 2009. I had now been posting relatively regularly for seven years. Not posting in the thousands but still a few tweets every few days. And of those snippets virtually no retweets just primarily original thoughts and content. And in January 2016 I stopped.

    It was never intended to be permanent. I had had small breaks before. I didn’t close my account nor did a final post saying goodbye or wrapping up my content. I just stopped for a couple of days, which turned into a month, then more and so on.

    In fact I didn’t start up again until November of that year and even then didn’t feel the need to post dozens of little insights to make up for my absence.

    The problem was that starting up again, out of the blue, seemed far more difficult than the stopping, particularly when you value your words as an art form as much as I do. After such a long break any new, reestablishing post had to be poignant, unique, thoughtful.

    There were times during my sabbatical I had felt the odd urge to post. Worried that any momentum I had worked so hard to establish was being eroded. Missing the occasional times when I could add some odd social commentary or gag based on a contemporaneous event. Even using the format to quickly post an original thought or idea that I had that year.

    It wasn’t as if there weren't many opportunities in 2016 that I would probably have commented on. Such as Harambe, the gorilla shot when a boy fell into his enclosure, the summer of european football as well as Olympic atheletics and even the tiny matter of the UK voting to leave the European Union. All good grist to my mill.

    But it was another political upheaval which eventually piqued my interest enough to get a comment out. Donald Trump was elected on 8 November 2016 as the 45th President of the United States. It wasn’t that fact though, millions were already making every permutation of comment on that. My frustration fuelled by a lack of Social Media venting eventually broke due to a technically lowly British political figure, Nigel Farage. Lowly in position but a crucial force in the decision the United Kingdom took regarding Brexit.

    You can read the tweet and all the other significant ones I posted that year below, all precisely as they were available online.

    Because of the paucity of posts in 2016 I am not going to do a summary of the best ten as I have previously done for all the preceding years. After all I only list eleven posts for 2016 and many of them would’t make the top ten!

    1 January 16

    A new year. So time for a new tweet
    That was it

    [A long break…]

    14 November 16

    Will @Time Magazine's Person of the Year be @realDonaldTrump ? Or perhaps more fittingly, the person behind the revolution. @Nigel_Farage
    [A few days later both were announced as shortlisted then Donald Trump got the award]
    The more astute of you will have noticed I'm back in the Twittersphere. You're welcome
    Have you seen this year's @johnlewisretail Christmas ad? Cute story with underlying message. We sell jumpers
    [The advert features a number of creatures bouncing on a trampoline]

    19 November 16

    Donald Trump has called for theatres to be a safe place to visit. Proving he has remembered some history
    [Donald Trump had criticised a new Broadway Musical, Hamilton, after his deputy was harangued]

    29 November 16

    I'm not happy with the Oxford Dictionaries Word of the Year 2016, post-truth. It's not a word but a compound of two. Which, ironically suits

    5 December 16

    Southern Rail are planning to compensate passengers a month's prices due to poor performance. It's the fare dodgers you have to feel for

    13 December 16

    #Twitter now has #GreatSearchFacilities so are #Hashtags #really #necessary #anymore? #hashtagOverkill ##

    25 December 16

    So it's a big HAPPY CHRISTMAS to all my followers.
    Sorry, that should be ...to both my followers

    29 December 16

    #mediablackout
    Tweet Redacted

    [The Tweet was issued following surge of #mediablackout Tweets following many celebrity deaths in 2016, then the elderly Queen missing key events due to ‘a bad cold’ because some users started to worry about a conspiracy of media silence]

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Version 5.306 20 May 2020
    Tweets First Published: Twitter during 2016



    Best Tweets of 2015

    For those of you that just like the best of the best I have curated this list of my top ten best Tweets of 2015. Based on my personal choice, not based on views, likes, comments or retweets. They are in no significant order other than date of posting.

    I went to mime school. Didn't like it. But I didn't say anything
    I tried one of those selfie sticks. I prodded a man three feet away and asked him to take my photo
    Some are saying that the number of Bees are reducing. I say ollocks
    If I were to do the #GreatNorthRun I'd dress in motorcycle helmet, jacket and boots. Then add the motorcycle for authenticity
    Met a guy who was an ex-thief, now looking for a job. He said he was willing to take anything
    Toilet roll.
    One of the less popular choices in Greggs
    Of course the wealthy already have driverless cars. Or as they call them, chauffeurs
    China's one child policy failed miserably. In 2014 nearly 17 million were born
    Last night I found out two things.
    1) Ripping the wife's bra off with your teeth is very exciting
    2) Dental charges have gone up 10%
    My wife has a wicked sense of humour. She only laughs at witch based shows

    Have I picked the ten best? If you want to know the full story of my Tweets in 2015 just scroll down.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Curated: Version 5.295 25 Apr 2020
    First Published: Twitter during 2015



    2015 Tweets: My Twitter Story of 2015

    Once more into the breech my friends. The muzzle that is the Twittersphere, that is. This is the story of my Tweeting Years in 2015. Or at least the most remarkable ones.

    You will see that after over five years of fairly comprehensive and regular use of the service my interest began to wane a bit, particularly in the first quartile. However this break allowed me to recuperate some energy for the SM site and I came back strong from May.

    As always this collection will be more enjoyable if you start off on the understanding that this is not Reuters, a travelogue or a series of pointless lifestyle snapshots from a pretty young blonde. You have to understand that this is a random take on vicarious subjects with an attempt to find at least some humour in each carefully, hand written, crafted paragraph.

    All the entries here are [mostly] exactly as they were posted online, contemporaneously, without rechecking spelling, grammatical corrections or censure, due to a desire to maintain historical accuracy. However I have added an odd explanatory [word, letter or sentance] to make sense of some situations as they stood at the time.

    So, there you go, enjoy. You should see many great one liners from this year

    4 January 15

    Brought myself a smart TV. Now it keeps showing up my inadequacies

    It continues... If you want to read the full article just click the appropriate blue button above.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Curated: Version 5.295 25 Apr 20
    First Published: Twitter during 2015



    Best Tweets of 2014

    For those of you that just like the best of the best I have curated this list of my top ten best Tweets of 2014. Based on my personal choice, not based on views, likes, comments or retweets. They are in no significant order other than date of posting.

    Should all atheists be called Godfrey?
    #iwasinaband that gigged only in cake and sweet shops. Back then we were huge
    One day I'll tell you about the grizzly I live with. Bear with me
    My Uncle lost his wife at the zoo. I suspect the Anteater #animalalphabet
    Reversed the car back down the multi-storey car park ramp. Which was wrong on so many levels
    I beat all the chickens in a race. But I did have to break into a run
    I said you're not the usual dental assistant. She said no I just fill in
    I was in the restaurant and asked to see the waiter. I was shown the second man in the queue
    I said "I knew a boxer once" He said "Amateur or Professional" I said "Pedigree"
    Fireworks - So be careful with it

    Have I picked the ten best? If you want to know the full story of my Tweets in 2014 just scroll down.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Curated: Version 5.282 31 Dec 2019
    First Published: Twitter during 2014



    Twitter '14: My Twitter Story of 2014

    As usual I continued my use of Twitter throughout 2014 and have once more collated all the most memorable ones here for prosperity.

    Not that you will get any actual prosperity from reading this, or even checking the full archive at www.twitter.com/vinceunlimited, nor even if you check out my current tweeting, also at… well you know by now.

    Looking back at my tweets during the year shows I was pretty busy doing the old tweet thing, just check out my productivity on 22 April 2014 for proof. Generally I majored on simple, humorous one liners including some you may see relating to the current issues of the day. I just wish I could remember them all so they could be amusingly inserted into my conversations at appropriate moments.

    All together the collection provides a fantastic archive of amusing ideas, indeed a diverse, eclectic range from an inventive mind. Or, if you prefer, the confused rantings of someone who has yet to find something to settle on.

    A couple of minor themes to look out for this year including a handful of tweets with hashtags, for example #iwasinaband in January and #animalalphabet in March, although most tweets are unrelated to each other, apart from their author.

    As usual all the entries here are [mostly] exactly as they were posted online, contemporaneously, without rechecking spelling, grammatical corrections or censure. This is not due to laziness but a desire to maintain historical accuracy. However I have added an odd explanatory [word] or letter to help explain any mistakes.

    So, go forth, read and enjoy.

    6 January 14

    Should all atheists be called Godfrey?

    It continues... If you want to read the full article just click the appropriate blue button above.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Version 5.282 31 Dec 2019
    Tweets First Published: Twitter during 2014



    Best Tweets of 2013

    For those of you that just like the best of the best I have curated this list of my top ten best Tweets of 2013. Based on my personal choice, not based on views, likes, comments or retweets. They are in no significant order other than date of posting.

    I got flashed whilst turning round under a speed camera. It was a three point turn
    Going to a fancy dress party dressed as a 9mm round of ammo. I'm hoping this will get me in a magazine
    [On the new Mr Selfridge TV series] So far in this series he's not sold one fridge
    We had a greyhound called Scissors. He never got enough exercise as we were not allowed to run with him
    Saw a bald man at the Fringe Festival. That's just not right
    I used to transport vicars to church. Lovely vehicle, leather seats, aircon, electric windows. Strangely, no rev counter
    There are many stand up comedians operating in London now. Which is an indictment on the NHS
    Someone asked me the difference between a Kite and a Buzzard. I said buzzards have brown plumage & yellow beak, whereas kites have a string
    Toilet roll's run out. Quite a surprise. I didn't even know it could walk
    There's a gap in the curtains. Damn retail outlets everywhere these days

    Have I picked the ten best? If you want to know the full story of my Tweets in 2013 just scroll down.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Curated: Version 5.269 8 Jul 2019
    First Published: Twitter during 2013



    Thirteen Tweets: My Twitter Story of 2013

    2013 was a year that saw a greater uptake of high quality flat screen TVs including the introduction of 4K screens, a scandal involving unlisted horse meat found in British processed meat products, the Church of England attempting to disrupt Wonga financial services plus the spacecraft Voyager finally breaching the outer limits of the solar system. So naturally I made comment on all these things.

    I also continued to gently mock issues relating to my favourite subjects, technology, cars, news and politics along with many other things that I personally watched and experienced. As usual the main theme was humour and I grabbed opportunities all year round to post such irreverence and gags.

    Remember, all entries both past and live can be followed at www.twitter.com/vinceunlimited

    1 January 13

    Russell Crowe, Russell Crowe, riding through the glen That is why, that this film, watched by all women

    It continues... If you want to read the full article just click the appropriate blue button above.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Version 5.269 8 Jul 2019
    Tweets First Published: Twitter during 2013



    Best Tweets of 2012

    For those of you that just like the best of the best I have curated this list of my top ten best Tweets of 2012. Based on my personal choice, not based on views, likes, comments or retweets. They are in no significant order other than date of posting.

    Ironic that all visitors to the Goodwood Festival of Speed start in a slow moving traffic jam
    I asked my misses if all our home contents were insured. She said we had a blanket insurance cover. Seems to be a bit specific
    Spent several minutes in the shop marvelling at the new large screen 3D TV only to realise I was looking out the window
    My last girlfriend was really clingy. Haven't seen her since our rock climbing days
    For my A levels I got an A* in maths, chemistry & physics. It was a real shock. Particularly as I studied music, German & artistic dance
    I've woken up this morning with a bad back. I can't even recall buying it drinks and inviting it back to my place last night
    I'm suffering from adjective amnesia. I just can't describe how it feels
    When I married her my misses was worth her weight in gold. And has kept up with inflation ever since
    My family believes in Creationism. And has for tens of thousands of years
    Do you know the best place to start a career in the aircraft industry? Boarding School

    Have I picked the ten best? If you want to know the full story of my Tweets in 2012 just scroll down.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Curated: Version 5.260 9 May 2019
    First Published: Twitter during 2012



    Tweety Twelve: My Twitter Story of 2012

    2012 was a momentous year in the UK, bolstered by the success of the Olympic Games.

    It wasn’t quite so momentous on my Twitter account as it was merely business as usual as I continued my task all year by providing a diverse range of eclectic, interesting, amusing and thought provoking content.

    I continue to do this summary for each year because Twitter is transient but some of my content is worth preserving and hasn’t yet been seen by everyone.

    As usual I only include the best posts below, all as they appeared at the time.

    Remember, all entries both past and live can be followed at www.twitter.com/vinceunlimited

    15 January 12

    Wimbledon on TV. Can't imagine a film made about any of the other Grand Slams. Although I thought I saw Paris Open on the Internet once

    It continues... If you want to read the full article just click the appropriate blue button above.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Version 5.260 9 May 2019
    Tweets First Published: Twitter during 2012



    Best Tweets of 2011

    For those of you that just like the best of the best I have curated this list of my top ten best Tweets of 2011. Based on my personal choice, not based on views, likes, comments or retweets. They are in no significant order other than date of posting.

    Woman on train constantly fiddling with her blackberry. She really ought to get a mobile phone if she wants something to do
    If they cut out all the stuttering would The King's Speech have won an Oscar in the short film category?
    It's not right to be showing all the latest films in 3D. Particularly if you are only in Class 2C
    I suggested my wife signs up to the donor programme. On her death about four normal women could benefit from a bum transplant
    Just had a fish pedicure. I thought why not? No skin off my nose
    The chap who invented matches was alright but he failed to set the world alight
    My misses is always watching her soaps. Tonight it's Dove, Coal Tar and Imperial Leather
    The guy who lays Tarmac Drives went on Dragon's Den. I'm dying to know how his pitch went down
    Someone told me they are my biggest fan. I replied "Well blow me"
    I came up behind a plumber and gave him a tap on the shoulder. He said "Are you trying to put me out of work?"

    Have I picked the ten best? If you want to know the full story of my Tweets in 2011 just scroll down.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Curated: Version 5.250 29 Jan 2019
    First Published: Twitter during 2011



    3rd Year Tweets: My Twitter Story of 2011

    I joined Twitter at the beginning of 2009 and had made a summary of the best Tweets from that year under the title 'Primary Tweets'. I did the same again for 2010 under the title 'Ten Tweets'.

    I continue to feel proud of my contribution to the platform so it seems natural to create a similar story for other years, in particular here for the third year of my tweeting, 2011.

    Again it is not a complete reposting of every Tweet that year. You will need to visit my @vinceunlimited Twitter Feed to get absolutely everything.

    Finally, for those without the time on their hands to read the whole story I have also created a 'Best of 2011 Tweets'.

    This is my Twitter story of 2011.

    Of course, the full gamut of entries both past and live can be followed at www.twitter.com/vinceunlimited

    Here I continue my ongoing story of tweeting, into it's third year, with this particular article extracting the most repeatable from the annals of 2011.

    I do this summary for each year because of the nature of Twitter. Most posted entries are transient items of the moment, seen only by the limited numbers of people who are actually following and reading at the time. Due to my belief that many of my posts are worth recording for prosperity I reproduce the best of a particular year’s postings below, unedited and still containing the original poor sphelling and grammar. And as you will see it is the usual mix of quick fire wit and comment charting some of the year’s notable events and despite what most non-Twitterers think, nothing at all about my duck-faced selfie habits.

    As usual, all entries both past and live can be followed at www.twitter.com/vinceunlimited and you might like to know that the best of my 2009 & 2010 posts can be found in previous entries 'Primary Tweets' for 2009 and 'Ten Tweets' for 2010.

    14 January 11

    My wife called me officious. Clearly demonstrating that she hadn't read my email on the matter

    It continues... If you want to read the full article just click the appropriate blue button above.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Written and first Published: Version 5.250 29 Jan 2019
    Tweets First Published: Twitter during 2011



    Best Tweets of 2010

    For those of you that just like the best of the best I have curated this list of my top ten best Tweets of 2010. Based on my personal choice, not based on views, likes, comments or retweets. They are in no significant order other than date of posting.

    I went into a sandwich bar and ordered a pint of cheese and tomato
    I wrote to ask if I could be the lead in the band. They wrote back to say they don't use poisonous materials
    Have you seen the pirated Avatar copies? Amazing 3D effects. Film in the background. Cinema audience in the foreground
    I have a pet Ulant. It's a stubborn little creature.
    Wednesday. From the Greek word meaning silent d
    At work people are always trying to pick a fight with me. Really must give up my job as a Professional Boxer
    I went to South Africa last week. I was only heading for Tesco but you know how difficult SatNav programming is
    Last year our economy went to the dogs. I wonder if this year it might like to go bowling?
    I'm going to vote for change. Because my car's parked on a meter
    Do ocean going liners have cruise control?

    Have I picked the ten best? If you want to know the full story of my Tweets in 2009 just click the appropriate blue button above.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Version 5.183 28 Aug 2018
    First Published: Twitter during 2010
    Curated: Version 5.183 28 Aug 2018



    Ten Tweets: My Twitter Story of 2010

    I joined Twitter at the beginning of 2009 and had made a summary of the best Tweets from that year under the title Primary Tweets.

    I felt proud of the contribution I was continuing to make in 2010 so it seemed appropriate to make another story summation of my year's content postings, as below. Including noting the three month sabbatical I took in the summer, following my practice 'month off' earlier in the year.

    Although fairly comprehensive it is not a complete reposting of every Tweet that year. You will need to visit my @vinceunlimited Twitter Feed to get absolutely everything.

    Finally, for those without the time on their hands to read the whole story I have also created a 'Best of 2010 Tweets'

    This is my Twitter story of 2010.

    Of course, the full course of entries both past and live can be followed at www.twitter.com/vinceunlimited

    Around this time [1 Jan 2011] one year ago I posted a summary of my best Tweets from 2009. So, as we put away 2010 by folding it into a neat pile and get 2011 out ready for full use it is time for me to once more summarise my past micro-blogging year.

    I do this summary each year because of the nature of Twitter. Most posted entries are transient items of the moment, seen only by the limited numbers of people who are actually following and reading at the time. Due to my belief that many of my posts are worth recording for prosperity I reproduce the best of this year’s postings below, unedited and still containing the original poor spelling and grandma. And as you will see it is the usual mix of quick fire wit and comment charting some of the year’s notable events and despite what most non-Twitterers think, nothing at all about my eating habits.

    This is my Twitter story of 2010.

    As usual, all entries both past and live can be followed at www.twitter.com/vinceunlimited and you might like to know that the best of my 2009 posts are in previous entry Primary Tweets [posted 31 Dec 09].

    1 January 10

    It's 2010 & I've just had a clear vision of the future. According to my vision in ten years time it will be 2020. Which is perfect vision

    It continues... If you want to read the full article just click the appropriate blue button above.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Version 5.183 28 Aug 2018
    Tweets First Published: Twitter during 2010
    Full Article Written and Published: Version 3.0 on 1 Jan 2010
    Extract created: Version 5.183 28 Aug 2018



    Best Tweets of 2009

    For those of you that just like the best of the best I have curated this list of my top ten best Tweets of 2009. Based on my personal choice, not based on views, likes, comments or retweets. They are in no significant order other than date of posting.

    Generally I'm a fan of predictive text. However, sometimes my worms come out all fanny and change the moaning completely
    Damn. Just broke my Crystal Ball. It fell off the table. I didn't see that coming
    I said "Whats that?" She said "Its an age spot." I said "Just the one?" It's suddenly more frosty this morning
    The instructions read 'Store in a cool place'. Which explains why I was trying to get into Samuel Jackson's movie trailor
    Decided to form a band. Our unique theme will be that we'll perform in cake shops. I guarantee that in five years we'll be huge
    My brother told me he is using chip fat to power his old diesel car. Reckons he gets 73 miles per potato
    Male Polar Bear asks his girlfriend to wear heavy make up just for a change. She replies 'I'm not pandering to you.'
    They asked whether the apartment I rent out came with Sky. I said yes. Big blue thing just above the roof
    ...Sado-masochists Beat Themselves Into Second Place In Online Poll
    I tried to get though the Tile Discount Store door but they had reduced it by 50%

    Have I picked the ten best? If you want to know the full story of my Tweets in 2009 just click the appropriate blue button above.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Version 5.161 27 Jun 2018
    First Published: Twitter during 2009
    Curated: Version 5.161 27 Jun 2018



    Primary Tweets: My Twitter Story of 2009

    On 14 January 2009 I signed up for a Twitter account. I wanted to see how this new Social Media system worked. Plus, as with all new SM concepts that I discover my first action is to protect my vinceunlimited brand, which is why I often have more SM sites than actual friends on them. And so began a journey in 140 character bursts.

    At the time Twitter, in the UK at least, was seen as something done by geeks. I knew of the service from the many Tech podcasts that I subscribed to through iTunes. I did not know of anyone personally who used it or had tried it. I was a trail-blazing geek amongst my peers. In truth, the 18,997,357th of them.

    Given the nature of the service most entries posted are transient items of the moment, seen only by the limited numbers of people who are actually following at the time. The Twitter following model allows people to selectively read the musings of chosen others. This is important as there would be no way to track the ramblings of all the millions of users. It is also not necessarily common for new followers to read the history of previous entries. I certainly haven’t got the time to do this for those that I follow.

    However, I believe that many of my posts are worth recording for prosperity. I know that this bold statement could be read negatively, that I am so vain anything I write must be as wonderful as fluffy chicks. However, I think there is genuine real interest in these postings, if nothing else possibly as a record of SM at the time. I certainly believe this or I wouldn’t take the effort to copy it all out. Plus, the entries I have selected suit the standard of the rest of the site, some being mini ideas or opinions or amusing jokes and puns.

    This is my Twitter story of 2009.

    Of course, the full course of entries both past and live can be followed at www.twitter.com/vinceunlimited

    My first ever Tweet - Posted 14 January 09 at 09:47 was...

    I've given in to the pressure of all my technopeers and have finally created a Twitter account then posted my very first 140 character Tweet

    You may like to note that I spent quite some time crafting this mini-masterpiece and it used all 140 available characters.


    It continues... If you want to read the full article just click the appropriate blue button above.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Version 5.161 27 Jun 2018
    Tweets First Published: Twitter during 2009
    Full Article Written Dec 2009 and Published: Version 2.04 in Dec 2009
    Extract created: Version 5.161 27 Jun 2018



    The @vinceunlimited Twitternovel Story

    Exploring limitations of a new Social Medium

    A radical new concept devised by Vince, published in twitter.com/vinceunlimited during March 2009.

    I started using the short format, public posting service Twitter in January 2009. During my initial explorations of the service I noticed that no one I knew was using the service to publish a story. I presumed established authors considered the format lightweight, limiting or offered no opportunity for monetisation. These were no barriers to me so I commenced a Twitternovel in March 2009 which ran alongside my other Tweets at that time.

    I called the story one25 which was the amount of characters I had to use each time allowing for a hash tag search identifier [#one25], chapter number, message and continuation mark to fill the entire 140 character limitation set by the service.

    I also planned to do exactly 125 entries over 125 days but this would be only realised by the reader at the end. I only had a vague idea of the story, preferring to make it up as I went along, although I did plan some internal Twitter references. The introduction was posted at 8:46 p.m. on 1 March 2009...

    #one25 A new way to enjoy Twitter. A Novel in 140 character Tweets by @vinceunlimited. For comments or discussion please use #one25note

    And the story began...

    #one25 001 Normally waking up in a giant cage in a laboratory would be a concern but after what Jo had just been through it was a relief tbc

    #one25 002 Jo looked around. It was dark but the shadow ahead looked suspiciously like a huge rat. And what were those things? Whiskers? tbc

    #one25 003 Jo twitched & the whiskers moved. She was a rat. But having four foot whiskers had to wait. The other rat was heading her way tbc

    #one25 004 A huge rat with piercing eyes running at Jo wasn't actually the most frightening thing. What was that shadow chasing the rat? tbc

    #one25 005 The rat coming at Jo was scooped up by a mighty hand then whisked away. Was Jo next? She noticed the cage door was left open tbc

    #one25 006 Jo scurried to the door. She looked around the room. Two men were preparing the inject the other rat. Was this now Jo's fate? tbc

    #one25 007 Jo looked down. The drop looked 50' but someone had left a towel on the floor. She took her chance and launched into the air. tbc

    #one25 008 As Jo fell she worried about the landing and experienced flashing red lights with a piercing scream. Then she hit the ground tbc

    #one25 009 She crashed heavily into the towel. Jo rolled back upright and saw one of the men leaving the lab. The door was closing shut tbc

    #one25 010 Jo raced across the room. She thought she just got through the closing gap but the door slammed shut, on the end of her tail. tbc

    #one25 011 The door closing on Jo was excruciatingly painful. But she could see someone coming. Would she have to gnaw off her own tail? tbc

    #one25 012 Without choice, Jo braced herself and bit hard into her tail, her sharp teeth cutting clean through. Then she heard a scream. tbc

    #one25 013 The shrieking woman would draw attention. Jo had to act fast. People are scared of rats so Jo ran at her and leapt in the air tbc

    #one25 014 Jo flew headlong at the giant girl. The girl turned & batted Jo to the side, tumbling her against the wall, knocking her out. tbc

    #one25 015 Thankfully Jo recovered senses quickly. She saw an outside door & ran for it. Her momentum took her straight into a busy road tbc

    #one25 016 In the road Jo was confronted by a speeding truck nearly 200' high coming straight towards her. She braced herself for impact tbc

    #one25 017 The lorry driver saw Jo the rat in the road and steered towards her. Thankfully Jo fell in a pothole so survived the impact. tbc

    #one25 018 Jo scurried to the pavement and ran into an alley, wondering how rats survived. Then came face to face with a twenty foot cat tbc

    #one25 019 The cat leapt onto Jo grabbing her by it’s giant jaw. As teeth dug into Jo’s neck she experienced more red lights and screams tbc

    #one25 020 The many red lights & piercing screams subsided as Jo realised there was no more danger. But she did have a rat in her mouth tbc

    #one25 021 Jo's jaw dropped open with surprise & the rat fell to the ground. As it ran off Jo noticed it had the end of the tail missing tbc

    #one25 022 Jo looked down and saw she had cats legs & paws. First a rat, now a cat. What was going on? And what was that growling sound? tbc

    #one25 023 Jo turned to see a huge dog nearly three times her size, barking furiously. As she backed away she noticed it was salivating. tbc

    #one25 024 The rabid dog made a scary lunge. The flashing red lights & screams returned. After subsiding Jo was looking at a scared cat. tbc

    #one25 025 Strange. Whenever Jo got scared she experienced flashing red lights & screams, then transferred bodies. Could she force this? tbc

    #one25 026 Experimenting, Jo cornered the cat, growling gently. As predicted it lashed out across Jo's nose, causing lights and screams tbc

    #one25 027 Immediately Jo was again looking at the dog. Still rabid, but this time with a bleeding nose. Jo figured it was time to exit. tbc

    #one25 028 Jo slipped by the dog, bounding out the alley, feeling lithe as the cat she was. She had to find a place to sort herself out tbc

    #one25 029 Jo crept along the pavement avoiding the people. It was then she realised she wasn't in a giant world. She was just cat sized tbc

    #one25 030 Jo climbed onto a pile of boxes to get a view. She looked around. Where was she? A big city. American. How did she get there? tbc

    #one25 031 She could still read the shop names but she failed to read the warning sign on the door behind the boxes. And it opened up. tbc

    I temporarily suspended the service at the beginning of April 2009. I wondered whether the story was being followed as enthusiastically as I was posting it. I also became aware of difficulties in posting updates amongst my other entries and wondered how it may be seen. Were my new followers confused about the strange Tweets? Were my oldest followers tolerating a story they had no intention of following? I waited for a comment or three on the suspension and received nothing.

    Probably due to the normal low interaction level by Twitterers, as it is a fundamentally passive experience, coupled with my low following numbers and the fact that for all they knew the story was finished I now have an abandoned, unfinished project.

    I may reignite the interest again. Maybe on the second anniversary. Maybe when I have thousands of followers. Maybe under a separate Twitter account. Maybe never.

    I am sure the concept is sound. In fact on 3 March 2009 a Radio 4 presenter commented that she suspected someone had devised the format. I immediately posted the following...

    R4 presenter then added that she suspected someone, somewhere was probably writing a Twitternovel. Yes that would be me - next one25 follow

    If you want this resurrected, let me know.

    Author: Vince Poynter
    Version 5.174 16 Aug 2018
    The Twitternovel was first published in twitter.com/vinceunlimited during Mar 2009
    This narrative first published in this website Version 3.0 Mar 2010