The Social Media Page

Hello. You have arrived at the vinceunlimited Social Media page.

The Social Media page is a new section in the vinceunlimited universe designed to collate all the relevant stuff off the site for a particular type of reader, in this case the Social Media Whore. In time this page will be fully populated with all the SM related content found within the vinceunlimited site.

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.236 20 Nov 2018

vSearch by Date

September 2015 - May 2015 - December 2014 - November 2014 - August 2014 - May 2014 - May 2013 - September 2012 - December 2010 - April 2010 - December 2009 - September 2009 - March 2009 - March 2008 - June 2006

vSearch by Title

Dear FaceBook - Driving Like Me - Eastmas - Four Play - The Fun Of All Smears - I don't know who you are... - InstaFood - LikeAll - Messenger - Most Recent - My Space Blog - Oh Yea! Oh Yea! - Redacted - SM Best Friends - The Social Medium - Speak To The Nation - Suggestions - Temporary Message - Twitter2009 - Twitter2010 - Twitter Novel - Website Fail News - Wishes

September 2015


What if we all added a Like to every post we see in a day?

Would it make us all feel a little bit smug, perhaps.

Just add a Like to this to get it started

Author: Vince
Version 5.236 20 Nov 2018
First published: FaceBook status update on 22 Sep 2015
I received absolutely no Likes at all when this was posted
At present this site does not include a Like button facility

May 2015

I don't know who you are...

I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for game invites, I can tell you I don't have any. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you like my post now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you. I will find you. And I will laugh at your profile picture.

Author: Vince
Version 5.232 15 Nov 2018
First published: FaceBook status update on 20 May 2015


A white bowl sits on a small light wood table next to a bed containing a meal of smoked mackerel on top of some mashed potato on a bed of garden peas, topped with a generous spread of brown sauce and sprinkled with black pepper. A bright teaspoon is nestled in the meal
A stunning meal worthy of at least five Michelin tyres

Added a new photo to the album iOS Photos.

As you are all so fond of food photos I thought I might share my culinary skills.

Here we have mash, peas and mackerel topped with black pepper and brown sauce.

#FeelingHungry? - Not?


Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.231 14 Nov 2018
First published: FaceBook Status Update 19 May 2015
The photograph was taken by the author on 24 Nov 2011, first publically issued in the FaceBook Status Update 19 May 2015

December 2014


May I be the first to wish you all a very Happy Easter.

Hope your day is full of love and joy and X-boxes. Remember to think of those less fortunate than you, such as those on their own, those who have to work and others who have to put up with me today.

And remember not to eat too much, it's Christmas for the waste bin as well you know.

Author: Vince
Version 5.229 12 Nov 2018
First published: FaceBook status update on Christmas Day 25 Dec 2014

November 2014


Hi guys, I've been lax in my post updates lately. I really ought to let you all know what I've been up to lately. Hopefully this post will get you all up to speed.

Just one note before I start though. I hope you don't mind but I've had to redact some of the more personal data as I don't want FaceBook to have too much personal information on record.

Firstly work. I used to [redacted] but just recently, in fact just [redacted] years ago I decided to have a change and now I [redacted].

I am really enjoying doing this partly because I get to [redacted].

On a personal basis I'm still with [redacted] despite [redacted] and the incident with the large mole.

Health wise my doctor said my enormous [redacted] even though I use the cream daily.

I had a falling out with [redacted] so don't expect a Christmas Card this year. But at least I made a new friend when the [redacted] [redacted].

Now for the most important bit. I had a great bit of fortune recently on the [redacted] and won nearly [redacted]. I am going to share this all with my FaceBook friends. All you need to do is turn up at [redacted] on the [redacted] at [redacted] o'clock. All those that read my messages will now know this and be able to share in this. So see you on the [redacted].

Bye for now.

And remember if you don't share this post you will [redacted].

Author: Vince [Redacted]
Version 5.224 5 Nov 2018
First published: FaceBook status update 8 Nov 2014

August 2014


Hey FaceBook. Try telling us in a plainer way you won't forward messages again until we install your other Messenger App.

Don’t just put up a bland advert for it. I'm not in the habit of installing the usual crap peddled on your site. I certainly won't install via links through you.

And by the way. Why does it need a separate App anyway? Are we to expect a separate App for news, or photos or each of our friends posts soon?

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.211 15 Oct 2018
First published: FaceBook status update 14 Aug 2014


I'm wondering.

What if I said yes to every suggestion FaceBook makes about 'People I may know’.

Would I eventually befriend everyone on this site? All 1.28 billion of them.

Maybe, just maybe, FaceBook might stop pestering my feed with suggestions.

Also I might start accepting all the games invites.

Too far?

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.207 9 Oct 2018
First published: FaceBook status update 4 Aug 2014

May 2014

Most Recent


Just a quick note, in case you weren't sure. Yesterday was here before today. Please bear this in mind when I enquire about 'Most Recent'

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.204 3 Oct 2018
First published: FaceBook status update 28 May 2014


Please pass on this message to get four wishes just for sharing.

If you SHARE today you get granted four special wishes.

If you LIKE this post you will receive a special bonus wish. Your wishes will come true within a week.

If you don't pass this message on you will turn into a goat.

Terms and conditions: The author of this post cannot guarantee you will receive four wishes, or indeed any number up to the arbitrary value of four that is mentioned. To be honest it's unlikely you will get any. And it will make pigging all difference whether you like or share. The author is only looking for cheap link bait from gullible people. Although the timescales indicate you should act quickly you will get the same effect whether you do this now or twenty years in the future. In other words, fuddle all. It's just a proven fact that if you think you can ignore something at the moment you are unlikely to return again. And it's only suggested that something may happen in a week because loads of things happen in your week so there's a fair chance that you may find association where there wasn't any in the first place. If, in the unlikely event that you do make a wish and it comes true do you really think that reading, liking or sharing some bit of make believe nonsense had any effect on it? Really? Do you? And, seriously, do you think the mild threat is really going to turn you into a goat? Unless you are a goat foetus this is a highly improbable outcome so ignore this mild threat.

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.203 2 Oct 2018
First published: FaceBook status update 24 May 2014

Dear FaceBook

Dear FaceBook,

I don't know if you remember me. It's been a while so I hope you don't mind me writing to you out of the blue like this.

You may recall we used to be together when we were much younger. We were dreamers then. Me with my life and you with your incessant thirst for knowledge. We shared good times. We exchanged ideas, thoughts and sometimes the odd laugh.

But we grew apart. I heard rumours that you would spread our little secrets to all and sundry, no matter how many times I'd ask you not to. And you did have a nasty habit of constantly asking to play that awful FarmVille all the time.

So we stopped seeing each other. I moved on, particularly with my new best friend, Twitter. But I always kept you in my thoughts, observing you from afar.

Thankfully your FarmVille obsession seems to have rescinded, although sadly replaced by the frankly much worse Candy Crush Saga. How disappointing you are.

Despite this I think we can be friends again, even though I know deep in my heart you will still splash our private thoughts all around the place even if I continue to ask you not to. I'll just have to watch what I say. A technique I have learned from seeing how others patently do the opposite.

However, I am wiling to give us a go again. No promises. You know me. But let's hang out again. Although not with that Google crowd, I'm not that weird.

I'll probably start slow. Maybe the odd comment on our shared timelines. In time I may post some proper updates. Maybe even the occasional photograph. We'll see.

I think this will work, providing you stop asking me where I work, the school I attended more than three decades ago and what my inside leg measurement is. Some secrets a man must keep to himself. And some a man should just share with his old mate FriendsReunited.

And whilst we're at it stop suggesting I might know a load of people who clearly look like a frightful bunch of potential petty criminals. Yes I admit I may have shared my past with some of them but the fact that I have had little to do with them in the past forty odd years must tell you something.

And whilst we are on the new rules, don't start trying to find out where I go all the time. I don't share that sort of stuff with anyone. Except my friend FourSquare that is.

Despite all this I'm up for giving it another go.

Your old friend, Vince

P.S. Don't tell MySpace. I'm not reigniting that flame and he's already sad enough, it could tip him over the edge.

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.202 1 Oct 2018
First published: FaceBook status update 18 May 2014

May 2013

Driving Like Me

I don't like anything.

That is to say I don't LIKE anything.

I don't mean I don't like any thing. That would just be ridiculous. Or perhaps suggest my only experience of tech is the Amstrad emailer phone, the Sinclair C5 and the Blackberry Playbook.

What I mean is I never click on little digital thumb symbols to give my unadulterated approval of anything I see on the Internet. It is beset with implication.

It is such an easy thing to do and I often think I would love to give a simple little nod of approval to an article that's posted or a comment made. A nice way to encourage the author to keep up with their fine work.

The problem is I'm aware that the simple little LIKE feature can be a powerful tool in the hands of a menacing Corporate Social Media baron.

Say for instance I read a great tip on how on how to mend a leak in a Dutch levee and so added my approval. Before long and unbeknownst to me, my contacts may be bestowed with the message that Vince likes Dykes. My mates would exclaim, "Crikes, Vince likes Dykes."

As you can see I am no longer controlling my Internet profile. It is being blown out of proportion to my original simple and contemporary appreciation of my friend Michael's great posting on travelling Dutch waterways - Mike's Bike Hikes On Dykes - if you're interested.*

I personally wish the LIKE button remained just an innocent way to compliment something and where I would most appreciate this function is when I'm out and about on the road.

Imagine a LIKE button feature on cars using a simple dash mounted switch to display a screen mounted message. Wouldn't it be great if you could just flick your knob every time you saw something you appreciated on the road. And a little LED screen message popped up with the word LIKE.

You could use this to commend other motorists on good behaviour such as being let out of a side turning, leaving a proper stopping distance or generally getting out of my way when I'm trying to get home quickly to listen to a live video podcast.

I would love to get an acknowledged thumbs up for a great overtaking manoeuvre I had just performed or perhaps to dish one out as appreciation of you bringing out your posh new sports car on a wet Wednesday.

The natural extension of the motoring LIKE button is the obverse DISLIKE message. This would be applied for commenting on bad driving such as cutting in, poor lane discipline or running over a child.

And in this interconnected world the messages could be linked. When a LIKE or DISLIKE is given it could be Bluetoothly transferred between vehicles. In this way all the LIKEs and DISLIKEs could be tallied up over a period to give a measure on how considerate a driver you are.

The downside would be that before long this score would be wiretoothed to your insurance company to affect your premium. And unlike Stock Markets this value never seems to go down as well as up no matter how many LIKEs you would receive.

Another vehicle to vehicle message could be based on the the 'blue flag' indicator commonly seen in F1 racing. Imagine having an illuminated blue lamp to signify that the car behind is going quicker and is wanting to get past.

I travel, ahem, promptly but always leave a good stopping distance. This can confuse the average, ambling, myopic driver ahead, loping along thoughtlessly in an outer lane. He hasn't used his rear view mirror since 1973 and refuses to use the perfectly adequate and strangely empty lane to his inside but will politely move over if it is bought to his startling attention that another car is on the road and wishes to travel quicker. Even if on passing he immediately re-engages his previous position once more in that unfathomable lane change manoeuvre.

The 'I want to overtake you blue flag light' would be more polite than the traditional aggressive flash, the inside lane parallel formation drive with attendant shrug or the oft-used rear approach to within 6mm of the bumper. The latter being the favoured approach by drivers with four interlocking rings on their grille.

Incidentally all small Japanese cars driven by the elderly will have to have their blue flag message light illuminated every three minutes by law as they are invariably in the way.

I say bring on car to car comms. I would LIKE that.

P.S. if you like this blog click the LIKE button. I know I wouldn't.

P.P.S. *Did you really Google this?

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.198 25 Sep 2018
First published: WordPress 5 May 2013 [where there is an actual LIKE button. Go there and press if you feel so inclined]
Inter-vehicular comms, known now as V2V, were first proposed within an education document authored by Chai K Toh in 2001

September 2012

The Social Medium

I don't like what you post on FaceBook. Or the way that Twitter is used. I'm annoyed why photo sharing sites are ignored and think that most LinkedIn comments are preposterous. But don't worry, all is fine.

I suspect you feel the same about my use of social media. And probably the way your other contacts do all this as well. It's because there are no rules here so we make up our own.

The reason that I dislike all this is that you don't use these social networks as they should be used. Which is to say that you don't use them in the way that I interpret they should be used. I'll give you an example.

I don't use FaceBook to store and distribute my digital photograph collections. For a start I would think it presumptuous to assume you'd like to see them all and I do like to keep some of my life to myself. Plus if I wanted to share shed-loads of pretty pictures I'd use a proper photo-sharing site, like Flickr. It's the way it was first devised and shall always remain so.

Some selective photos of mine are published on FB which may be of interest to the few friends and family I save this site for. And every one of them is in focus I might add.

Ephemeral photos that I take are much more suited to the casual nature of Tweeting so you only get to see these if you follow me there.

Which brings me neatly onto the issue of followers and contacts. And a specific question. Why do you have so many? Yes, on the face of it it seems flattering that so many others want to be in your gang but there is a limit to these things and too many lessen the impact. It is a privilege to be considered a friend but not if everyone is. And I think it impossible to follow the posts of more than fifty or so active others, across all sites. So how do you manage your seventy, seven hundred or several thousand?

So this is how you should use Social Media.

At present FaceBook is the worst of the lot. It has become a dumping ground for everything that is good or bad in social media and tries to emulate and steal the ideas from every other format. It wants your posts, your pictures, your locations, your timeline, your soul. By all means use this as a one stop shop if you know no better but as you are are reading this I guess you do know better so don't!

If FB must be used, use it only for close friends and family. Restrict posts to interesting things about what you are getting up to. If you need to arrange a meeting use the phone or text.

Only share photo collections on photo-sharing sites such as Flickr. And group them by activity, event or date. With all miscellaneous content clearly labelled so. And just delete the duplications and the ones with your damn thumb in the corner.

Don't however treat Instagram as a photo sharing site. Use this to create interesting, vivid content not as a place to dump every photo of parties, pies and peers.

Respect your Twitter stream by properly following just a handful of people who genuinely interest you, whether they be friends, famous or followable.

Your friends and relations do like to see where you are and what you are doing there so use a site designed for this purpose such as FourSquare. Or if you are watching something try sharing with GetGlue.

Keep LinkedIn professional. Only post relevant notes about your career and work related issues. And no avatar photos of you on a beach or the piste, unless that is your workplace.

If you can't think of anything amusing, pertinent or interesting to say post nothing. And when a thought enters your mind carefully choose the appropriate medium.

Only selectively requote or link to other peoples content. Stop constantly referencing other people's stuff. If I had an interest in their diatribe I'd find it myself. Save the plagiarism for satirists.

And finally, ignore Google+ because that upsets geeks, was far too late for the party and Google should stick to searching.

Only please don't do any of the above. Because you are you not me.

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.195 14 Sep 2018
First published: WordPress 11 Sep 2012

December 2010

Ten Tweets: My Twitter Story of 2010 - Introduction

I joined Twitter at the beginning of 2009 and had made a summary of the best Tweets from that year under the title Primary Tweets.

I felt proud of the contribution I was continuing to make in 2010 so it seemed appropriate to make another story summation of my year's content postings, as below. Including noting the three month sabbatical I took in the summer, following my practice 'month off' earlier in the year.

Although fairly comprehensive it is not a complete reposting of every Tweet that year. You will need to visit my @vinceunlimited Twitter Feed to get absolutely everything.

Finally, for those without the time on their hands to read the whole story I have also created a 'Best of 2010 Tweets'

This is my Twitter story of 2010.

Of course, the full course of entries both past and live can be followed at

Around this time [1 Jan 2011] one year ago I posted a summary of my best Tweets from 2009. So, as we put away 2010 by folding it into a neat pile and get 2011 out ready for full use it is time for me to once more summarise my past micro-blogging year.

I do this summary each year because of the nature of Twitter. Most posted entries are transient items of the moment, seen only by the limited numbers of people who are actually following and reading at the time. Due to my belief that many of my posts are worth recording for prosperity I reproduce the best of this year’s postings below, unedited and still containing the original poor spelling and grandma. And as you will see it is the usual mix of quick fire wit and comment charting some of the year’s notable events and despite what most non-Twitterers think, nothing at all about my eating habits.

This is my Twitter story of 2010.

As usual, all entries both past and live can be followed at and you might like to know that the best of my 2009 posts are in previous entry Primary Tweets [posted 31 Dec 09].

1 Jan

It's 2010 & I've just had a clear vision of the future. According to my vision in ten years time it will be 2020. Which is perfect vision

It continues... If you want to read the full article click on the blue button:

Finally, for those without the time on their hands to read the whole story and just like the best of the best I have curated this list of my top ten best Tweets of 2010. Based on my personal choice, not based on views, likes, comments or retweets. They are in no significant order other than date of posting.

I went into a sandwich bar and ordered a pint of cheese and tomato
I wrote to ask if I could be the lead in the band. They wrote back to say they don't use poisonous materials
Have you seen the pirated Avatar copies? Amazing 3D effects. Film in the background. Cinema audience in the foreground
I have a pet Ulant. It's a stubborn little creature.
Wednesday. From the Greek word meaning silent d
At work people are always trying to pick a fight with me. Really must give up my job as a Professional Boxer
I went to South Africa last week. I was only heading for Tesco but you know how difficult SatNav programming is
Last year our economy went to the dogs. I wonder if this year it might like to go bowling?
I'm going to vote for change. Because my car's parked on a meter
Do ocean going liners have cruise control?

Have I picked the ten best? If you want to know the full story of my Tweets in 2010 just select the Twitter 2010 option above.

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.183 28 Aug 2018
Tweets First Published: Twitter during 2010
Full Article Written and Published: Version 3.0 on 1 Jan 201
Extract created: Version 5.183 28 Aug 2018

SM Best Friends

Just updated to the latest FB update.

It can now allow me to state who my best friends are.

Or, in other words, show all the others they are just a bunch of second-rate monkeys.

Dumb. Needless to say you are all my best friends. Even the monkeys amongst you.

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.182 27 Aug 2018
First Published: FaceBook Status Update 29 Dec 2010

April 2010

Oh Yea! Oh Yea!

So the site [Version 3] is finally up and running. A few teething troubles getting iWeb to publish it on the Apple Server farm in the correct way then republish it in the proper place at the URL but it’s there and raring to go.

I did some tests on the formatting both on my Apple machines via Safari and then on my Dell notebook on both IE8 and Firefox. Firefox handled the layout well but IE8 seemed to want to put the photo captions below the photos, pushing the whole page down and off the end. Frankly this is the result of using a MS Windows browser and serves you right. It may be an XP issue so I’ll wait for the comments to filter through.

Regarding comments, the Apple version at [Apple link no longer available] should provide an easy way to add comments to these blogs. Go via the URL and the facility isn’t repeated. However the mail link can be used to send comments to me.

Also, the process of adding to the URL from iWeb converts the site address to an unnecessarily complex which could be altered by complex HTML reprogramming but Version 3 was meant to eliminate all that.

For any way you visit the experience should be similar and finally I can announce that vinceunlimited is back where it belongs and I duly did that at some of my various SM sites.

Posted on my Facebook site

Hi All, just to let you all know the spammers have been defeated, the moat refilled and the drawbridge raised so I can formally announce that is up and running again.

I have redesigned it completely using a preformed skin and uploaded some photos to enhance the many and increased words.

Let me know how your browser deals with it as it was composed on a Mac and so far only quickly tested on that and a Windows notebook.

I found that Firefox handled the layout better than IE8 but then again if you are using IE8 then you deserve no better!

If you visit via [Apple link no longer available] then you should get the full experience including ability to post comments on my blog, although why I'm telling you lot that I've no idea.

Any feedback will be most welcome.

Keep FaceBooking, Vince

Posted on my MySpace site

Just a quickie to let you all know that the vinceunlimited website is back up and running.  Get your browser to show you and you'll see what I mean.  Revamped, new content, pictorially enhanced and continuing its theme of idling away the time for any reader.  Makes you wanna go all [smiley]


You will have to wait until the end of the year to see what I twittered, unless you go to Still you have all year now to read the site.

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.179 23 Aug 18
First Published: Blog within Version 3.0 on 1 Apr 2010

December 2009

Primary Tweets: My Twitter Story of 2009 - Introduction

On 14 January 2009 I signed up for a Twitter account. I wanted to see how this new Social Media system worked. Plus, as with all new SM concepts that I discover my first action is to protect my vinceunlimited brand, which is why I often have more SM sites than actual friends on them. And so began a journey in 140 character bursts.

At the time Twitter, in the UK at least, was seen as something done by geeks. I knew of the service from the many Tech podcasts that I subscribed to through iTunes. I did not know of anyone personally who used it or had tried it. I was a trail-blazing geek amongst my peers. In truth, the 18,997,357th of them.

Given the nature of the service most entries posted are transient items of the moment, seen only by the limited numbers of people who are actually following at the time. The Twitter following model allows people to selectively read the musings of chosen others. This is important as there would be no way to track the ramblings of all the millions of users. It is also not necessarily common for new followers to read the history of previous entries. I certainly haven’t got the time to do this for those that I follow.

However, I believe that many of my posts are worth recording for prosperity. I know that this bold statement could be read negatively, that I am so vain anything I write must be as wonderful as fluffy chicks. However, I think there is genuine real interest in these postings, if nothing else possibly as a record of SM at the time. I certainly believe this or I wouldn’t take the effort to copy it all out. Plus, the entries I have selected suit the standard of the rest of the site, some being mini ideas or opinions or amusing jokes and puns.

This is my Twitter story of 2009.

Of course, the full course of entries both past and live can be followed at

My first ever Tweet - Posted 14 January 09 at 09:47 was...

I've given in to the pressure of all my technopeers and have finally created a Twitter account then posted my very first 140 character Tweet

You may like to note that I spent quite some time crafting this mini-masterpiece and it used all 140 available characters.

It continues... If you want to read the full article click on the blue button:

Finally, for those without the time on their hands to read the whole story and just like the best of the best I have curated this list of my top ten best Tweets of 2009. Based on my personal choice, not based on views, likes, comments or retweets. They are in no significant order other than date of posting.

Generally I'm a fan of predictive text. However, sometimes my worms come out all fanny and change the moaning completely
Damn. Just broke my Crystal Ball. It fell off the table. I didn't see that coming
I said "Whats that?" She said "Its an age spot." I said "Just the one?" It's suddenly more frosty this morning
The instructions read 'Store in a cool place'. Which explains why I was trying to get into Samuel Jackson's movie trailor
Decided to form a band. Our unique theme will be that we'll perform in cake shops. I guarantee that in five years we'll be huge
My brother told me he is using chip fat to power his old diesel car. Reckons he gets 73 miles per potato
Male Polar Bear asks his girlfriend to wear heavy make up just for a change. She replies 'I'm not pandering to you.'
They asked whether the apartment I rent out came with Sky. I said yes. Big blue thing just above the roof
...Sado-masochists Beat Themselves Into Second Place In Online Poll
I tried to get though the Tile Discount Store door but they had reduced it by 50%

Have I picked the ten best? If you want to know the full story of my Tweets in 2009 just select the Twitter 2009 option above.

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.161 27 Jun 2018
Tweets First Published: Twitter during 2009
Full Article Written Dec 2009 and Published: Version 2.04 in Dec 2009
Extract created: Version 5.161 27 Jun 2018

Temporary Message

Website update.

Decided to completely remove my old vinceunlimited website content due to the malware infections and replace it with a temporary message.

If for any reason you have bookmarked my site or any content pages I suggest you delete the links, particularly as these will never be used in that format again.

I'll keep you informed when the proper version is ready.

My vincepoynter site is unaffected

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.159 24 Jul 2018
First Published: FaceBook 10 Dec 2009

The Fun Of All Smears

Well I've had no response to my 14 Sep 2009 [MySpace] entry so I figure I'm all alone out here in MSLand.

Not that this will discourage me from posting a warning to anyone inquisitive enough to check out my website.

Unfortunately, due to some scandalous spanners Google has slapped a Fear All Ye Who Enter Here sign on the door.

I'll get it fixed by the end of the year and simultaneously launch the exciting v3.

I would venture to suggest you may not be able to wait but as no one is there I guess you can!

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.158 23 Jul 2018
First Published: MySpace 9 Dec 2009

Website Fail News

00:33 - Hi guys. Just a quick note to warn you all not to head for my website at the moment as some shady spammers have attempted a Somalian Pirate move on it prompting Google to ward off visitors. I have hoovered out the culprits and reset settings but you will still get the Nuclear melt-down messages for now. This could be my incentive to get on with finalising version 3.0

19:32 - Can anyone recommend a great web hoster? Primary ability must be to have a closed front door

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.157 20 Jul 2018
First Published: FaceBook 8 Dec 2009
At the time the Web Host I was using was Web-Mania

September 2009

Four Play

I thought I'd do something on [MySpace] as I am quite impressed by the new MySpace iPhone application.

A phenomenal improvement on the previous unintelligible tat that I've been suffering for the last four months.

Other than the fact the sign in page still resolutely refuses to remember me I will give it four out of four.

All I need now is for a few of my friends to rekindle their interest and I might start using the service as much as FaceBook.

Which is about every four months as well.

If anyone notices the fact that I have made this entry please let me know. I might even be encouraged to post again.

Bye four now.

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.153 16 Jul 2018
First Published: MySpace 14 Sep 2009

March 2009

The @vinceunlimited Twitternovel Story

Exploring limitations of a new Social Medium

A radical new concept devised by Vince, published in during March 2009.

I started using the short format, public posting service Twitter in January 2009. During my initial explorations of the service I noticed that noone I knew was using the service to publish a story. I presumed established authors considered the format lightweight, limiting or offered no opportunity for monetisation. These were no barriers to me so I commenced a Twitternovel in March 2009 which ran alongside my other Tweets at that time.

I called the story one25 which was the amount of characters I had to use each time allowing for a hash tag search identifier [#one25], chapter number, message and continuation mark to fill the entire 140 character limitation set by the service.

I also planned to do exactly 125 entries over 125 days but this would be only realised by the reader at the end. I only had a vague idea of the story, preferring to make it up as I went along, although I did plan some internal Twitter references. The introduction was posted at 8:46 p.m. on 1 March 2009...

#one25 A new way to enjoy Twitter. A Novel in 140 character Tweets by @vinceunlimited. For comments or discussion please use #one25note

And the story began...

#one25 001 Normally waking up in a giant cage in a laboratory would be a concern but after what Jo had just been through it was a relief tbc

#one25 002 Jo looked around. It was dark but the shadow ahead looked suspiciously like a huge rat. And what were those things? Whiskers? tbc

#one25 003 Jo twitched & the whiskers moved. She was a rat. But having four foot whiskers had to wait. The other rat was heading her way tbc

#one25 004 A huge rat with piercing eyes running at Jo wasn't actually the most frightening thing. What was that shadow chasing the rat? tbc

#one25 005 The rat coming at Jo was scooped up by a mighty hand then whisked away. Was Jo next? She noticed the cage door was left open tbc

#one25 006 Jo scurried to the door. She looked around the room. Two men were preparing the inject the other rat. Was this now Jo's fate? tbc

#one25 007 Jo looked down. The drop looked 50' but someone had left a towel on the floor. She took her chance and launched into the air. tbc

#one25 008 As Jo fell she worried about the landing and experienced flashing red lights with a piercing scream. Then she hit the ground tbc

#one25 009 She crashed heavily into the towel. Jo rolled back upright and saw one of the men leaving the lab. The door was closing shut tbc

#one25 010 Jo raced across the room. She thought she just got through the closing gap but the door slammed shut, on the end of her tail. tbc

#one25 011 The door closing on Jo was excruciatingly painful. But she could see someone coming. Would she have to gnaw off her own tail? tbc

#one25 012 Without choice, Jo braced herself and bit hard into her tail, her sharp teeth cutting clean through. Then she heard a scream. tbc

#one25 013 The shrieking woman would draw attention. Jo had to act fast. People are scared of rats so Jo ran at her and leapt in the air tbc

#one25 014 Jo flew headlong at the giant girl. The girl turned & batted Jo to the side, tumbling her against the wall, knocking her out. tbc

#one25 015 Thankfully Jo recovered senses quickly. She saw an outside door & ran for it. Her momentum took her straight into a busy road tbc

#one25 016 In the road Jo was confronted by a speeding truck nearly 200' high coming straight towards her. She braced herself for impact tbc

#one25 017 The lorry driver saw Jo the rat in the road and steered towards her. Thankfully Jo fell in a pothole so survived the impact. tbc

#one25 018 Jo scurried to the pavement and ran into an alley, wondering how rats survived. Then came face to face with a twenty foot cat tbc

#one25 019 The cat leapt onto Jo grabbing her by it’s giant jaw. As teeth dug into Jo’s neck she experienced more red lights and screams tbc

#one25 020 The many red lights & piercing screams subsided as Jo realised there was no more danger. But she did have a rat in her mouth tbc

#one25 021 Jo's jaw dropped open with surprise & the rat fell to the ground. As it ran off Jo noticed it had the end of the tail missing tbc

#one25 022 Jo looked down and saw she had cats legs & paws. First a rat, now a cat. What was going on? And what was that growling sound? tbc

#one25 023 Jo turned to see a huge dog nearly three times her size, barking furiously. As she backed away she noticed it was salivating. tbc

#one25 024 The rabid dog made a scary lunge. The flashing red lights & screams returned. After subsiding Jo was looking at a scared cat. tbc

#one25 025 Strange. Whenever Jo got scared she experienced flashing red lights & screams, then transferred bodies. Could she force this? tbc

#one25 026 Experimenting, Jo cornered the cat, growling gently. As predicted it lashed out across Jo's nose, causing lights and screams tbc

#one25 027 Immediately Jo was again looking at the dog. Still rabid, but this time with a bleeding nose. Jo figured it was time to exit. tbc

#one25 028 Jo slipped by the dog, bounding out the alley, feeling lithe as the cat she was. She had to find a place to sort herself out tbc

#one25 029 Jo crept along the pavement avoiding the people. It was then she realised she wasn't in a giant world. She was just cat sized tbc

#one25 030 Jo climbed onto a pile of boxes to get a view. She looked around. Where was she? A big city. American. How did she get there? tbc

#one25 031 She could still read the shop names but she failed to read the warning sign on the door behind the boxes. And it opened up. tbc

I temporarily suspended the service at the beginning of April 2009. I wondered whether the story was being followed as enthusiastically as I was posting it. I also became aware of difficulties in posting updates amongst my other entries and wondered how it may be seen. Were my new followers confused about the strange Tweets? Were my oldest followers tolerating a story they had no intention of following? I waited for a comment or three on the suspension and received nothing.

Probably due to the normal low interaction level by Twitterers, as it is a fundamentally passive experience, coupled with my low following numbers and the fact that for all they knew the story was finished I now have an abandoned, unfinished project.

I may re-ignite the interest again. Maybe on the second anniversary. Maybe when I have thousands of followers. Maybe under a separate Twitter account. Maybe never.

I am sure the concept is sound. In fact on 3 March 2009 a Radio 4 presenter commented that she suspected someone had devised the format. I immediately posted the following...

R4 presenter then added that she suspected someone, somewhere was probably writing a Twitternovel. Yes that would be me - next one25 follow

If you want this resurrected, let me know.

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.174 16 Aug 2018
The Twitternovel was first published in during Mar 2009
This narrative first published in this website Version 3.0 Mar 2010

March 2008

My Space Blog

Hi, thought I'd try a blog on MySpace to try to re-kindle some enthusiasm for my entry.

So far have been a member for a few weeks but only have one friend - Tom. Not that Tom is a great friend. He is some sort of automated start-up tart who befriends everyone just so they don't look like Billy no-mates.

Being a Billy no-mates has seemingly attracted a few stunning females who claim to want to be my mate, but as they reside in Wisconsin, USA and claim they hail from Salisbury in the UK their cover as porn links are blown so get sent to the great junk dump in the sky.

Seriously, if you are a fit female and genuinely want to chew the cud at least make out you have read my site. Or mention the word Hippopotamus. At least that way I know you're not just after my credit details.

Not that you have to be fit or female to get a response. I'll reply to anyone. Except Tom.

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.149 10 Jul 2018
First Published: MySpace 1 Mar 2008

June 2006

Speak To The Nation

A voice for all seasons

Each decade seems to have its own individuality. Examples like the 1950s Rockers, the 1980's excess, even the 1890's engineering.

However the 2000's are too young and incomplete to judge but early indications are that the time we are living now may well be remembered as the time of celebrity.

In fact, a particular brand of publicly available, disposable celebrity that every young person seems to think is their inalienable right.

And I think maybe a little known Dutch company is to blame.

Endemol Productions devised Big Brother almost a decade ago but now its tentacles spread far and wide. The phenomenon continues unabated and promises the dream of 'being somebody' to everyday nobodies.

The never ending contestants' limitless desire to achieve a career [read richies] out of merely being known is almost eqaully matched by our own natural voyerism into these real-life soap operas.

So endemic is the problem that natural talent is being side-lined for manufactured pop-culture.

A good example of this is the huge list of singing competitions. In the past to be a songbird usually meant teaming up with a writer and creating something, not rearranging someone else's work.

And as a writer this gnarls at my groin.

It's time to fight back and I'll do it in my old traditional way - by joining them!

Although scathing about the concept of fame TV I actually have a desire to be part of it.

I too am seduced by the promise of eeking out an easy living and would relish the lightweight, unearned adoration that entails the lifestyle. Cheap, but desireable nonetheless.

But Reality TV producer's don't come knocking at the door, at least not mine, so I need to get positive and the way I propose is to propose a way.

My idea is to set up a few video booths around the country and invite anybody who cares to leave any message they want.

They would be stationed in public squares, parks and stations and be the twenty-first century version of speaking at Hyde Park corner.

The messages will be recorded and sifted by a team of editors to extract the interesting from the banal, with the best featuring on a weekly programme.

Some may choose to record daily dairies, others may vent their spleen, but most will just be childish giggling and vociferous slang.

Not to worry, talent and interest will shine through and there will be gold amongst the dross.

I know you are now thinking that this has been done before. After all, even the failed contestants of some singing shows get their chance to prove in a video booth why they were not selected the first time round. So why would this format be successful?

The answer is money.

The twist would be that it would cost a nominal amount to record the message. The booths would operate only on the basis of fiscal intercourse.

In the same way that TV companies love programmes that force viewers to pay by voting on a telephony device, producers would love a TV system that pays for itself to be made.

All I need now is a TV Production Company and I'll be able to share the decade with the Dutch.

Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.133 13 Jun 2018
First Published: Ideas section within Version 2.03 in Jun 2006
'Big Brother' is a fly on the wall style documentary TV programme whereby miked up participants, chosen by their personalities and looks are grouped to live close to each other in a house surrounded by cameras to capture their every movement and conversation. The footage is edited to entertain and as time progresses the viewers get a chance to vote out the least interesting characters thereby ending with a winner who receives a cash award
If you are thinking this idea is just YouTube which is a widely used free service please note that I offered this idea in Jun 2006. YouTube was only founded as a web address in Feb 2005 and it took a few months to get funding and wasn't formally launched until Dec of that year. In mid 2006 it wasn't that well known, certainly not by me. In fact it wasn't until 2010 that I uploaded my first video to YouTube