A man and a woman. Entirely different.
First things first. Let's not confuse gender with sex. Heidi Klum doesn't have gender appeal and I've never had gender in the back seat of a car. Nor Heidi Klum come to think of it.
However, I am against too much of this modern fetish with political correctness. Men and women are different. Live with it. In fact, celebrate it. We don't want to end up in an andronomous society where you can't tell your mother from the plumber.
I'm not a misogynist (look it up) and I'm not against lesbianism. In fact I think I might be a lesbian. I share all their ideals, I just don't get to change in the same cubicle when I go swimming. And I have better hair.
I applaud equality. That is, I applaud fair equality, not the trumped up excuses used in positive discrimination. All women shortlists should only be reserved for surrogate breast feeding jobs. Not to select members of parliament. Even if they are all tits which people suck up to! - Couldn't resist that one.
Men love the way women look so good. In all shapes and sizes. Keep those curves on view and appreciate it when we look at your thighs. You know that if you hide yourselves away you will end up putting up your own shelves. And it has taken men millions of years to learn how to read a map. Women won't achieve it in their lifetime.
And as for the men. Stop being a bunch of wimps. Don't be afraid to get down the gym and pump those pecs. And it's not an insult to hold open a door or offer your seat. Stand up and be counted. Women will only be Kylie if you are prepared to be Russell Crowe.
As for me. I'm off down the gym, to pick up my map and drive over to Heidi's.
Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.018 13 Nov 2017
First Published: Version 1.00 in Oct 2003
The text is reproduced, unedited, as published in Oct 2003 and represented the author's views at the time
The image depicts the author and his wife sat astride a Can-Am Spyder three wheeled motorcycle as manufactured by Bombardier Recreational Products. It was taken on 25 Sep 2016 and added in Version 5.018 13 Nov 2017