The Centre - Explanation

This is the centre page of the vinceunlimited website.

No, not the one in the middle. Web sites don't quite work that way.

This is just one small part of the section about me which is in the process of being worked on and uploaded.

Note: If you are reading this stateside I'll give a quick translation. It is centre, not center because in Great Britain we didn't all originate via a few Quakers from the West Country, who obviously couldn't spell some words. If in doubt, ask your Mum. And yes, I did write Mum correctly. Mum is not spelt Mom, as you would realise if you listened to the word. Honestly, you can build the Ford Mustang, produce Top Gun and get people into space but the basics. Hopeless.


Author: Vince Poynter
Version 5.008 18 Oct 2017

Dead Centre

It's logic Jim. But not as we know it.

Photograph of Lynda pointing out Australia on a large globe
My wife clearly missing where the centre of the universe lies. Clue - It's taking the picture

Where can you find me? Only at the centre of the universe. That's where.

It is a brave statement indeed to make a claim that I can be found at the centre of the universe. Even more foolhardy to state that I can prove it. But I am and I can.

Firstly you need to understand and accept the concept of infinity. It is quite easy this bit. Infinity in terms of distance is a very long way away, then a bit more. Kind of like further than that beer on the coffee table when you are slumped in front of the TV. Even further away than your chances of dating a Hollywood megastar, unless you are another Hollywood megastar of course. Or a film producer. Or a thousand dollar hooker of course. Anyway, you get the picture. Infinity is such a huge number that when applied to distances I wouldn't like to drive it - Not without a comfort stop.

Now, if I were to move forward, as far as possible, to the edge of infinity it would take me...? Let's see, about the same time as it would if I were to move backwards at the same rate to the edge of infinity. I shall call that time X. No, I won't, I'll call it Gerald, other people always call it X.

Anyway, in Gerald, travelling at a constant speed I could reach the edge of infinity from any direction I please. Infinity is the same distance, up, down, front, back or even sideways. Whether you are on a pushbike, in a sidecar or a space shuttle travelling at twenty six times the speed of Gerald.

If this is the case I must surely be right slap-bang in the centre - Of the Universe. Point proved.

Now, all I have to do is prove that I'm also immortal. That one could take some time.


Author: Vince Poynter
Version m5.008 18 Oct 2017
First Published: Version 1.00 in Oct 2003
Slight editing and image added in Version m5.008 18 Oct 2017